Friday, February 18, 2011

Miscarriage

Scott and I consider ourselves to be tremendously fortunate to have succeeded at becoming pregnant with Jack during our first month of trying. I know so many people who try for so long to become pregnant at all- numerous interventions, miscarriages, countless negative pregnancy tests.

Having been fortunate in this way, I didn't know what to say to a friend who confided in me today, that at eight weeks pregnant there was no longer a fetal heartbeat. I'm so sad for her and her husband, and the miscarriage of their first pregnancy. We helped them move into their first house together just last weekend, and we joked about the room which would become a nursery "one day". I had an inkling she was pregnant just from her actions on that day, but there was no confirmation until today.

I called to let her know I would be thinking about her, and to offer my ear if she needed to talk in the coming weeks. She is sitting at home today, waiting to miscarry. I feel helpless, yet I know only too well there really isn't anything I can offer to her to make the hurt go away.

She has a positive attitude about it, she sensed this was coming. She is sad for her husband as he is always so happy and optimistic and felt so confident there would be no miscarriage, he attended work today rather than taking another personal day (as he had many of these in recent weeks between moving, attending the first ultrasound, etc.). She faced this appointment alone.

I'm heartbroken for the both of them.

I don't understand why the worst things happen to the best people.

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