Friday, March 11, 2011

2 Months ago Jack became a hero

It was two months ago today my husband and I cuddled and kissed Jack's teeny, tiny body for the last time. We wheeled our first born, adored, sweet little angel down to the Operating Room at SickKids to make the best out of a horrific situation. Jack was going to be an organ donor, his final gift.

I've mentioned before that Jack's liver went to a terminally ill little boy in the United States.  Another few months and we can write to them. But what would we write? Take care of that liver, it belonged to a little boy loved more than life itself? Be careful with that liver- it comes from a long line of beer lovers (my husband works for one of the largest in sales and marketing... We joke his grandpa single handedly keeps one of the brands alive...) and is extremely potent? Be grateful for your sweet boy, love the shit out of him, and please be so proud of him no matter what he choses to do in life- we would give anything to have ours back? Your little boy carries a pieces of our hearts in his body?

I'm sure they know all that though. Because until January 9th or 10th, they were looking at a very sick little boy, with little hope in the world he might be saved. What are the chances the right liver, with the right blood type, sizing... the right everything will come in time? I can't even begin to imagine the joy they must have felt when they received the page on the beepers all donors are provided once they are on the list... To be sitting there while the final tests are being conducted, praying so much this is the organ for them, but crying for the family (ours) who had to say goodbye in order for their miracle to take place... To kiss their baby one final time as he was wheeled into the OR for the surgery which will ultimately save his life, but knowing they could lose him in surgery too. Luckily they didn't and the surgery was a success.

To think that family has had 2 months with an increasingly healthy little boy. I've read that the skin colouring of the skin changes very quickly from the jaundiced yellow to the clear, pink skin... How incredible. The idea that parent might gently trace the scar lines with their finger as they change his diapers, and that they likely squeeze their baby tightly every night, thankful for that second chance.. THAT makes my heart swell.

The other little boy, based on my subpar math skills, will be turning 1 soon.  Strange how the world works... Two babies born, one baby born sick but lives, one baby born healthy but died. Weird.


My New Normal said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
My New Normal said...

What an amazing gift that you were able to give to another family. I'm so impressed that during your darkest time you were able to think about another family and their pain.

Maybe you should send them this blog post? Or maybe you should just share Jack's story with them. So they know what a special baby he was and just how much you loved him.

lissasue3 said...

Just like you said, they know how precious life is. And they'll be thanking little Jack for the rest of their lives.

It's awesome how a part of your son lives on. Beautiful.

Molly said...

So heartbreaking and heart warming at the same time. I cannot imagine making that choice, but what a lovely thing you and Jack did! You should be so proud!

Gail said...

I'm in tears right now reading this post and typing this comment in response. You, your husband and baby Jack are all incredibley brave. This touched my heart.

Are are right, life is precious. I'm sure the family of that little boy will be thanking you for the rest of their lives. I'm sure no words could explain how thankful they are.

Hang in there. I know theres nothing I can say or do to make the pain go away or make things better. You guys are in my thoughts.

BTW, I'm going to follow you. *hugs*

Dana said...

I like this for the letter : "Your little boy carries a pieces of our hearts in his body?" It sums it all up. I agree with My New Normal, they would probably love to know Jack's story. Are you allowed to send them a picture of Jack?

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