Thursday, April 7, 2011

Tonight I Can Write (The Saddest Lines)

When I was in my last semester of high school (10 years ago... barf), I was enrolled in a Writer's Craft class and we were given an assignment: to research, and then construct our own poetry.


At the time, I was dealing with the end of my high school relationship (relationshit if you're a Dane Cook fan)... The guy I thought I would marry and have babies with, and live happily ever after. I am eternally grateful I didn't!!!). When the relationship was ending, I thought that was the end of my life, and wondered how unjust and cruel this world was ...


That was obviously way before I realized the true meaning of unjust as well as how much I truly could love someone.


I've changed the "shes" to "hes" and ended the poem a little bit before it was intended to end because the poem obviously was written from the perspective of a man loving a women, not a women loving her son, but I hope you still see why I love it so much. <-- Please also pretend this isn't a run-on-sentence, please & thank you). 


Written by Pablo Neurda, Chilean poet. 


Tonight I can write the saddest lines.


Write, for example, 'The night is starry and the stars are blue and shiver in the distance.'
The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved [him], and sometimes [he] loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held [him] in my arms.
I kissed [him] again and again under the endless sky.

[He] loved me, sometimes I loved [him] too.
How could one not have loved [his] great still eyes.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have [him]. To feel that I have lost [him].

To hear the immense night, still more immense without [him].
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep [him]?
The night is starry and [he] is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost [him].

My sight tries to find [him] as though to bring [him] closer.
My heart looks for [him], and [he] is not with me.

The same night whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Here is the original, for reference sake:

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

Write, for example, 'The night is starry and the stars are blue and shiver in the distance.'

The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.

To hear the immense night, still more immense without her.
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is starry and she is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight tries to find her as though to bring her closer.
My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.

The same night whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but how I loved her.
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another's. She will be another's. As she was before my kisses.
Her voice, her bright body. Her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.

Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.

7 comments:

LookItsJessica said...

"To hear the immense night, still more immense without [him]."

sigh.

Becky said...

Oh I love it! Thank you for sharing it

I agree with you on not knowing what "unjust" really was until losing Liam. I had that same relationship and thought my world was over and my heart forever broken- Ha, if that Becky only new what she new now

Molly said...

To think that I do not have [him]. To feel that I have lost [him].

*double sigh*

TanaLee Davis said...

I love this. Poetry is something I have always been fond of. Especially when they are so personal and close to the writers heart. Thank you
~Felicia

Sherri said...

Beautiful!

New Year Mum said...

Sorry about my slow blogging this week :( Such a beautiful poem.. thank you for sharing it xoxo

Brooke said...

I just found your blog and I love this poem. I'm about to copy it down.

I'm so terribly sorry about the loss of your son Jack. The unfairness of these things still takes my breath away. I guess it's something you never get used to, even when you live with it every day.

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