I feel like I've fallen into a spiral of sadness over these last few weeks. I don't know whether to attribute the severity of my current cycle of grief to "where I am", to the fact our first round of Clomid didn't work, my period, or even to the fact I'm not yet pregnant. The concept of not "trying" until six months was so beyond my comprehension, I think I'm in a little bit of shock to think we're still waiting to "catch a rainbow". I think, probably a little of each has led me to why I'm so sad right now. I just miss my boy.
My poor husband inquired last night as to why we're not yet pregnant. Why it was so easy our first time around, and when, oh when would things start looking up? What do I tell him?
He misses Jack. Told me tonight. It's not like I don't know he misses him, but hearing him say the words breaks me a little more each time. Don't know about any of you, but man-grief is so hard to deal with. Not that any of this is easy, but seeing a heartbroken man crushes me...
Anyway, this was supposed to be an uplifting post. We are on day three of our 2nd round of Clomid, and I want to try to maintain a positive outlook as we approach ovulation... So start crossing toes and fingers for us, please and thank you. :)
Things I'm looking forward to:
- July 25th will be our two year wedding anniversary
- July 28th we will be going to see this very funny bitch an hour or so outside of Toronto. How typical is it he's performing in Toronto when we're out of town?
|Daniel Tosh, Tosh.0 on Comedy Central|
- Fly out of the Toronto City Airport July 29th from here:
- to here:
- We'll sleep here:
|This was my "must have" for the stay|
- And be seeing both of these activities in our short stay:
So, that's what I have planned and what I'm currently looking forward to. We also have to make the most of our 2nd round of Clomid, so that should keep me somewhat occupied until it's time for take off.
What about you? Any plans for the summer? Anyone taking a distraction trip like we are? Any suggestions on where to eat in NYC?